Dumbledore: “and with 350 points Slytherin wins the house cup
But I have a few extra points to give out
500 points to Dumbledore for being the best headmaster”
*house flags all change to Dumbledore’s face*
Again I ended up putting on a tv programme whilst doing something but then the programme ended before I was finished so then I had to put another one on but then I finished what I was doing within ten minutes and I had to watch to the end of the programme because it had buffered and it would be a waste of internet to do it again tomorrow.
OMG a person is saying how he’s just broken up with his girlfriend. It was mutually exclusive. Apparently he’s so glad that he’s single again and can go out and be free.
They only went out for two weeks. And they were both on holiday in different places over that time.
Sounds like twelve year olds who say they’re in a ‘relationship’.
ANOTHER PERSON JUST MESSAGED ME SAYING ‘FUCK ME PLEASE’
TWO DICKHEADS IN TWO DAYS.
The headline says “new Sappho poems discovered” but what I read is:
I know now why you aren’t supposed to eat in bed with a spoon in one hand and tumblr in the other.
I’VE LOST A PEA.
when someone’s flaws are not flaws in your eyes, you’re fucked.(via girlchoking)